Where to begin...

Hi, my name is Scarlet & I am in a DD marriage with my wonderful husband Clark who is my very own Superman ; )

I have been reading many different blogs for the past two years and wanting to start my own but always hesitating because I was nervous about keeping my anonymity-but I have been encouraged by Clark as well as a few women that I have emailed with back and forth, but especially one woman who although she never has pushed me has let me know she is excited for me & has been there for me & helped me process things and I am very greatful to her for her gentle nudges toward starting my own blog-thank you Sass!

How & when did DD start for us?  Well, officially it has been a little over two years that we have been working toward this dynamic, but for me my submission & my journey toward accepting that I am happiest when being submissive has been going on ALOT longer.

Clark is a gentle giant who would never in his wildest dreams have imagined that he would ever spank his wife.  When I first asked him to it was as part of  lighthearted foreplay and nothing else.  I felt that there was something wrong with me for wanting/needing it and so although I felt that something was missing I just kept that to myself & pretended it was just a kink of mine, I was very afraid that my (then) extremely vanilla husband would think less of me & reject me so I just let it be for fun for a very long time.  We didn't do it all the time just on & off, but it got to a point where I began to be frustrated with the fact that it always seemed to end before I got what I was needing from it.  It was shortly after the second of our three children was born that we hit a VERY rough patch in our marriage.  We still had sex but I was not interested at all which was very upsetting because my drive had always been very high and all of a sudden it was non-existent.  We got to this rough patch slowly but once we got there it was really awful all at once.  I had become a person that I really didn't like, I felt very alone & like all the responsibility for our home & children was on me.  I was mean to my husband & he accepted it.  I knew how to tear him down very well.  I am ashamed of it still, but at the time I felt totally justified because my husband wasn't "living up to" what I thought he  "should be" doing as a husband & father.  We went to marriage counseling for a little while & it helped some but we still weren't quite right.  I had always had a very special relationship with my paternal grandmother, she was more like a mother than grandmother to me & I looked up to, & respected her very much.  She was always submissive to my grandfather and they were happily married for over 60 years!  So I talked to her about marriage and slowly I started looking at things differently where my husband was concerned.  I lost her suddenly just over 2yrs ago & I was totally devastated.  We were also trying to get pregnant & having a hard time so things were super stressful and then a friend suggested I read 50 Shades of Gray.  So I did & although the books are not great, they were very helpful to my husband and I because they opened up a dialog that eventually lead to me researching "dominance", "submission", "spanking", and eventually I found domestic discipline blogs and although I was initially horrified, I shared it all with Clark.  Then I finally let myself be honest with myself.  I knew this was what I wanted, to be held accountable, to be loved and cherished and protected and dominated.  I told my husband that I wanted to try it. & he told me that he would be willing to try anything for me.  Anything that would make me keep smiling the way I had been since I read the books & started the research.  So we began, and it's been a long hall!  We have had many ups and downs but we are working together & I no longer feel alone, I know I have my own personal Superman in Clark & we will get past any obstical as long as we work together!