Questionnaire by Meredith.

Meredith has written a questionnaire, I did Dana's and then saw this one, we have had a very crazy few weeks but I finally have a little time to myself so here goes, thanks Meredith....


Do your eyes light up when he comes to you?  Yes & I hope they always do ; )

What sports do you watch together?  American Football!, baseball, basketball, Dodgeball, T-ball....anything our kids are playing lol!


On a scale of 1 to 10, how important is lingerie when it usually ends up on the floor? 0-1, Clark prefers a night gown or long t-shirt with nothing under it, or birthday suit lol!  I have a ton of lingerie & I think as the kids get older & we are not having to "fit in" our "fun time" as much it may make a come back.


Do you watch Netflix's House of Cards? No, we don't have Netflix.


What outdoor activity do you do together? Watching our kids play sports, swimming, & yard work.


What is his dream vacation? 

He would love to go back to Aruba where we honeymooned but for two weeks this time.
 

What is your dream vacation?  I would also love to go back to Aruba.  I would also love to see Italy & Ireland.


What is your favorite book of all time? Too many to choose so I will go with Good Night Moon as it is one of the books I have read at bedtime for many many years ; )

What was your last argument about?   Finding a restaurant to go to for dinner with the kids when we went to see our son at college.

Are there any words you use that he does not like? Anything disrespectful: Fine, whatever, great & sure (said sarcastically of course).


Do you have any restrictions about internet time?
During family time, mealtimes, our alone time, and if I am in trouble.

Do you have a phobia? Yes!  Arachnophobia (fear of spiders),  claustrophobia (fear of being in closed/small places), pnigophobia (fear of being choked).


When do you melt into his arms?
Whenever I am in them (unless I am being stubborn lol).

Are you watching Outlander? No, never heard of it, but I will have to look it up ; )


Does your Hoh have a motto? No, not really.  Just "if it's free it's for me" lol, but no HoHly ones.

What is your question for me? What is your least favorite aspect of DD/TTWD, What is your most favorite aspect & why?

60 Questions

I saw this on Dana's blog, and thought it looked like fun so here goes....Thanks, Dana!

I did the answers to this on this past Tuesday.....

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged? Yes, and I have been for the past 14 years ; )

2. Opinions on sex before marriage?

I think it is important to know if you are a good match in ALL ways before marriage.

3. Is trust a big issue for you? Yes, sometimes it is harder than others but overall yes, it's a big issue for me.

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? Yes-doing so now ; )

6. What happened last night? Had a date night with my man-yay!

7. Ever have plastic surgery? No, I would like to have a little bit but Clark says NOWAY! : p

8. Which are better - black or green olives? I prefer black, but green are ok too sometimes.

9. What is the last beverage you had? Water.

10. Ever won a contest? Yes-not recently though.

11. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans? Nope ; )

12. What are you gonna do Saturday night? Have maintenance (but we will have gotten to see our son that day & Clark may do mild maintenance because I may be emotional- he is so good to me).

13. What are you going to spend money on next? Hopefully a new vehicle!

14. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months? Of course, we all do ; )

15. Can you swim well? No, and Clark used to be a lifeguard so he makes me practice treading water every summer!

16. Have you had sex today? Yes!  It was a beautiful morning ; )

17. Regularly burn incense? No, but Clark does.

18. Are you in a good mood? Yes, just a little anxious.

19. Would you ever want to swim with sharks? NOWAY!!

20. What do you want right this second? Some food-I am ready for dinner!

21. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? Yes, I have never colored my whole head, I have done highlights a few times & in college I had a few purple & green streaks ; )

22. Hot tea or cold tea? Either, hot tea is great for getting my milk supply up ; )

23. Tea or coffee? Tea (herbal only), love coffee but due being pregnant & now breastfeeding I have to stay away from it.

24. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? My son at college & my grandmother who passed away-she was like a mother to me & I miss her every day.

25. Does everyone deserve a second chance? Yes, from God, but sometimes it is harder than others for me to give second chances to people.

26. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?  Yes, we are married ; )

27. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?  Yes (well only like once a year).

28. Do you know where the last person you kissed is? Right beside me-yay!

29. Who did you last call? My in-laws.

30. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?  Because I love him (and he is my HoH so I don't say no!)

31. Who would you like to see in concert? OAR, Josh Grobin.

32. What was the last concert you saw? 

Dave Matthews Band (6 mos pregnant & I fell asleep lol)!

33. Do you tan in the nude? Only when I was tanning for my wedding (the one. & only time I have done it).

34. Are you patient? Yes, very.

35. Who was the last person to call you? One of my best friends.

36. Do you sing in the shower? Yes, there are not many places that I don't sing!

37. Ever used a bow and arrow? Nope, & most likely never will-unless a toy one counts lol.

38. Do you think musicals are cheesy? No way!  I love them & cannot wait to get back into doing them.

39. Is Christmas stressful? Yes, but also magical & spiritual & wonderful.

40. Ever eat a pierogi? No, I actually have to look up what they are now lol!

41. Favorite type of fruit pie?  My grandmother's strawberry rhubarb.

42. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? A singer, dancer, actor-a "triple threat" & a mommy.

43. Do you believe in ghosts? Not sure....

44. Ever been in love? Yes!

45. Take a vitamin daily? I try to (sometimes I forget).

46. Wear slippers? Only in the winter-the rest of the year I am barefoot.

47. Wear a bath robe? Once in awhile.

48. What do you wear to bed? Comfy stuff.

49. First concert? 

New Kids on The Block!!!

50. Walmart, Target or Kmart? Target & Walmart-Kmart stinks.

51. Nike or Adidas? Nike.

52. Cheetos or Fritos? Fritos all the way!

53. Peanuts or sunflower seeds?

Sunflower seeds in my salad, peanuts as a snack ; )

54. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Oh yes, all the time....

55. What is your favorite book? Don't think I could pick just one, but as a kid Tuck Everlasting, Charlotte's Web, Pipi Longstocking, & the Little House on the Prairy books were my favs & I read them over & over!

56. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? Clark, Sass, & my 2 "rl" friends "Dove" & "Ravin".

57. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? Christmas, we have a family pic done every year.

58. Ever have a deja-vu feeling? Yes, and once it happens it happens for several days in a short time frame-it's so weird.

59. Listening to? The a/c whooshing sound.

60. Favorite cookie? Any made by my grandmother, especially her "Ricotta biscuits".

Crazy life

Life has been crazy in our home, for the past few weeks.  We are readying two children for milestones in their educational lives, in the next few weeks our oldest child will be moved into college and although he will not be too far from home he will still not be here.  He is not a mama's boy by any means, but he & I are very very close and I am struggling.  I am trying to focus on the positives, I know this is what he needs to do, it's a right of passage I would never deny him & I am so proud of him-but the fact remains that in my heart he will always be my baby.  My first born, my first true love, my little man.  Not having him around will be a serious adjustment for all of us, emotions are running high and that adds an extra layer of "stickiness" to the situation.  Pre DD I gave in to my temper ALOT, if I was feeling scared, or sad, or hurt it would all be expressed with anger rather that the true emotion I was feeling.  I have come a long way and I do not give into my temper much at all anymore.....normally, that is.  Lately I have been feeling like I should be wearing a warning sign that says "contents under pressure, DO NOT expose to open flame".  I usually go weeks (sometimes a month or more) between earning punishment spankings but within 8 days I managed to earn 5, I also had 3 maintenance sessions and a reset during that period.  I was very sore & very discouraged.  I am doing better this week so far but I am really struggling to stay in control of myself.  I have tried to explain my feelings to Clark but so far I have not been very successfull.  He is fair, none of the spankings I got last week were unwarranted or unearned but I struggled to submit to most of them anyway.  Not physically, I was physically able to put myself over his lap when he told me to, and bend over the table when he told me to, and answer the questions he asked appropriately, and address him just as I should have, but I couldn't bring myself to surrender emotionally.  I hid behind a wall of anger and refused to let the spankings reach me.  I made them worse than they had to be, on me and on Clark.  This week of spankings happened after a week of none at all due to vacation & not having any privacy and it started with a reset.  My attitude was bad and I ended up getting punished on top of the reset.  The next day we were doing ok, but when we discussed a mistake that Clark made I got angry all over again & made comments that were uncalled for.  I really pushed it, because although Clark is usually slow to announce that I have crossed a line, or he gives warnings before he "sentences" me, this time he told me immediately that I was getting a spanking that night when we got home  because of my behavior.  So what did I do?  Accept my fate appropriately & apologize?  Nope!  I shrugged my shoulders & said "oh well, I don't care, do whatever you want". It was the exact opposite of how I was truly feeling.   I felt awful about what I had said & I was very nervous about getting another spanking after getting two the night before, but I could not let myself give in to his authority.  Clark usually waits to lecture until the time comes to carry out the spanking but we were in the car on the way to a family function, the kids were distracted and he had time so he delivered a very thorough lecture that had begun to penitrate my "defenses" but then we arrived and the lecture/conversation had to be paused.  I stayed away from Clark for the first hour we were there, I just wanted some space to think.  I knew I was wrong for how I had acted, I knew the spanking to come was deserved but I just did not feel like "surrendering" to him, I knew that was wrong also, but I had no idea how to find my submission again.  I did end up apologizing after taking some time to think, and he appreciated my apology.  I also told him I had finally just gotten my "monthly visitor" aka my "curse".  He felt that PMS had played a big part in my bad behavior but not that it absolved me of wrong doing (not that I had expected or even hoped it world have), but that does change the way we do spanking so he needed to know anyway.  Due to it being extremely humiliating to me, we no longer do bare bottomed spanking when I have my "curse".  Sometimes he will wait until it is over to conduct the spanking but since it was the 1st day he decided to go ahead with an over the clothes spanking.  By the time we got home that night my attitude had gone right back to defensive & a bit fowl.  He tried talking to me before we went to the basement to "settle up", I told him that I knew I was wrong in how I handled my disappointment due to the mistake he had made & that I knew I was going to get punished but that I just did not feel submissive at all & didn't even feel like I wanted to submit.  He asked me why very gently & almost pleadingly & I told him I didn't know.  And I didn't, I wasn't lying or distancing or anything, I just felt angry and rebellious & like I just wanted to go away from everyone.  Him being gentle & calm with me when I am like this is just not what I need unfortunately, but I don't get to control the way other people act and react, only myself.  I also have trouble asking for help, Clark hates that I very rarely ask him for help when I am starting to get stressed & overwhelmed but it is very hard for me.  I have tried explaining to him that if I can manage to tell him I am feeling stressed that is sometimes all I can handle.  Clark unfortunately is not good at taking hints at times & needs things spelled out for him-this ends up not working out well for either of us.  I was (and still am) feeling out of control.   I am sad, and anxious and a little bit scared because my baby boy is leaving me & I want to handle it well but I'm not.  I think I may need to really feel Clark's dominance in order to be able to get myself back to mindset I want & need to be in for us.  I am just not sure how to go about getting what I need without feeling like I am "topping from the bottom" or "scripting" things for him.  I wish this was easier, I think I probably need to spend some (more) time praying about this & make sure I am really listening......